Thursday, April 13, 2006

Vanity fair

I have a love/hate relationship with Vanity Fair magazine. I hated the Hollywood issue. That cover of anemic skinny girls creeped me out. They looked prepubescent with ribs sticking and asses in the air and Tom Ford absurdly drooling on a girl. Cognitive dissonance.
I wish Annie Liebowitz would quit already.Her pictures have become boring and repetitive. Stars posed awkwardly wearing no clothes or millions of dollars of couture wear...Nothing in between, ever.
All the women of Vanity Fair are photographed as porcelain figurines , all their natural signs of humanity washed or more likely air brushed out. I don't get it. Is the "newborn" innocence thing all the rage?
Or has Vanity Fair just become lazy?
I know that a lot of the stars and I cannot tell you how much I hate that meaningless made up word organize and control every aspect of the photo shoot. Tom Cruise the egomaniac and obvious nutcase would never leave to chance how he looks. He has no problem sounding like he dumped his brain into the garbage but he doesn't want anyone to think he is ugly.
I am hoping Vanity Fairs' choice in photography is being controlled by the Hollywood monsters, at least it's an excuse of sorts.
What the hell is wrong with Jennifer Anniston? Fifteen years of normal likeable pictures thrown over for "look at me, look at me..I have boobs, can you see my boobs? oh please loook at me"
Her pictures are awful. Some people can relax and go with the half naked, hide the boobies with your hand, I am so damned sexy photo shoots. Jennifer Anniston is not one of those people. She oozes discomfort, she looks pained and uncomfortable, a fake "sexy" smile plastered on. I feel uncomfortable on her behalf and I can't stand her...hmmm maybe that's the goal..the sympathy vote.
I wish she had kept her mouth shut about her divorce. No divorce happens in a vacuum.It takes two people to have a marriage or not have one. If you are so dumb you think a marriage can survive seeing each other for two or three weeks every five or six months then you get what you deserve. You both made a choice, you picked career over each other and you reaped what you sowed.
I don't want to know about this stuff, I don't want to see you in my magazine half naked looking miserable. Leave me alone.

This months Vanity Fair was the "green" issue. Okay, so the heart? In the right place. George Clooney buys a goofy car and he gets the cover? Ten points off. A multi page essay from what's his name that guy who lost the election to George Bush? Okay, he has been an environmentalist a long time and I agree he has been right a lot but he was a two term vice president and didn't get anything done. He had the best opportunity of anyone and he bagged it without a fight. Hard to use him as your go to guy..sorry Al.
No more Bono, he has a big mouth but nothing behind the rhetoric. He hasn't spent a dime of his own millions to help so shut up rich guy that would rather buy another pair of nifty sunglasses.
His wife is actually the more interesting of the two. She has created a cool business that creates jobs in third world countries..she buys stuff and pays them real money..what a fabulous concept.

From what the scientists are saying we have moved past the point of no return and we will have to accept some climate change. Oceans will be bigger and we need to get moving quickly on returning and restoring our wet lands. We will have to move a little further inland. We will have to create a responsive and responsible emergency services department. All these things are doable. We will be able to adapt and change and that is what we are very,very good at.
The biggest thing we need to do is stop creating greenhouse gases pretty damn quickly.
Everyone knows what a tipping point is. When we have broke the camels back..that last stick in pickup sticks. If we keep ignoring the problem we will melt the Greenland Ice..Ice reflects heat back into the air, if the ice disappears the sun will be blazing down on ocean..dark,dark ocean. Just like black t-shirts absorb heat so does a dark ocean...We don't want to heat up the water....water expands when it gets warm. Warm water warms more starts melting every where..what happens when your ice cubes melt in your drink?
You don't get less too drink.
I really have no interest in having to paddle a canoe to work here guys.
Buy a car that gets a little better mileage, ask that your car be a flex fuel design so you can use ethanol . Just think when all the shit hits it? You will be driving your cool hybrid/ethanol while everyone else is walking.
It will make you popular!
Plant a few trees when you think about it. There are actually some cool web sites that link to greenpeace that will plant a tree for you according to how big your carbon footprint is.
You don't have to strap yourself to a tree and eat trail mix from a reusable cloth bag to be doing a good thing.
No one is asking you to join greenpeace and throw yourself in front of a whaling ship( can you believe the Japanese are still killing whales so they can have good erections?) all you need to do is pick up your garbage, buy a car that helps you save a bunch of cash and plant a few trees.
If you want to go really crazy try buying your coffee from someone other than StarBucks. Check around and find a coffee shop that pays market value to the people that actually pick your coffee beans.
Remember poverty grows the bacteria that feeds something to help real people make a decent living and take them out of the hands of the people that would use them to blow people up.


Post a Comment

<< Home

  • Google News
  • Edit-Me
  • Edit-Me
  • copyright harleynalice 2006